"I WOULD Give You a Smoochie On the Cheek, Coach, But I'm Wearing My Helmet Right Now..."
OK, enough picking on Urban Meyer's Man Crush on Tim Tebow.... So, everyone is rocked by the Florida football coach's decision to quit - then not to quit - being the Gators Man in Charge. There's a lot of confusion, with Meyer's alleged chest pains after getting stomped by Alabama in the SEC Championship, and other references to health issues. So, what's wrong with Coach Meyer. My guess is that he's got the same thing I've had for years - and millions of others have.
What is it? Restless Leg Syndrome....No, just kidding. From what I've read, Urban Meyer's got a good old fashioned case of Anxiety Disorder. Is it a form of mental illness? Technically, I guess yes. Why else would a guy want to quit a multimillion dollar gig to reload a football program every year? While it's not a laughing matter, it's not as serious as it might sound....
What is Anxiety Disorder? It's when you unnecessarily get wound up over stress to the point where you think you're having a heart attack. I've had it for about 13 years on and off than I know of, although mine was more of a feeling that you can't breathe, rather than chest pains... It's pretty manageable through medication, depending on your doctor. I took Effexor for about 5 years, although the baby Xanax was way more effective - but my doctor worried that the 1/2 pill I took daily would get me addicted. Retard....
Rather than drugs, the smarter way to treat it is behavior modification. Meyer is going to have to learn to calm himself down, and realize it IS all in is head. Mine is also affected by minor physical problems, like my sinuses and allergies, which trigger the 'fight or flight' attack. Most importantly, he needs to change whatever is causing the problem. Of course, there are few gigs that are easier than Head Coach of a football team. Meyer's problem is that he is an overachiever, and he is obsessed with winning it all every year. Dude, you have 2 rings..... No one will hate you if don't win it all this year or next year. Maybe having Tim Tebow - who has his own little obsession with perfection - leave campus will be good. You want stress? Try listening to 30 idiot customers complain while answering 100 phone calls a day, and dealing with 10 technicians and three bosses all at the same time. That is stress....
Nope, Urb's gonna have to figure it out for himself. For me, it was getting away from the job I hated, but didn't realize it. For him, it will either be 1) going 10-3, and being considered one of the top coaches in America, 2) Quit coaching, or 3) Die. My guess is he'll try Door Number One ....... and enjoy life and coaching again.
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Kicker Snafu Costs Dusty Lombardi a Shot at the Championship, Joins the Giants In Going Home ....
Football season is unofficially over. Oh sure, there are still plenty of games to play, but for us here at SC6, the year is over.... Not because the Tigers played yesterday, but because for intent and purposes, our season ended...... It's gonna be a long 8 months.
First off, our NY Giants showed about as much guts as a freshly cleaned catfish in getting thumped hardcore by the Carolina Panthers, 41-9. When you lose like that, you deserve to go home. At the same time, I was in the middle of my Fantasy Football Semi's with my arch-rival, Da Boilermakers. Two things sealed my fate: first the Green Bay Packers decided that it was more fun to run the ball down the Seattle Seahawks throats - and they did, scoring 5 rushing TD's, and letting Aaron Rodgers only toss one TD before pulling him. The other was my fault. I got cute and thought I would add a kicker since Green Bay was scoring so many TD'd, and not FG's. Well, Mason Crosby kicked two FG's, and six PAT's for 13 points, while Shayne Graham, who I just picked up for this week, only scored 5 pts. I lost by 6 points 130-124 .....
Yeah, the NY Jets might make the playoffs after yesterday's gift in Indy (BTW, thanks for benching Dallas Clark too..), but no one really likes the Jets... The black flag is out, and it's wait til next year. When I came back to Fantasy Football, I cockily called my team DustingOffMy Lombardi. This year, it became Dusty Lombardi. Now, having gone 3 seasons without a title, there is only one suitable name for next year ........ Rusty Lombardi ! Maybe Crusty Lombardi.
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This May Be the Luckiest Place in America .....
Today, we take you to the Cards N Such store in Rocky Point, New York. It's about 15 miles from me, and it may be the luckiest place in America. Yes, I've used the term 'lucky' three times already... Why, because it was the place where the winning ticket in this week's New York Mega Millions $162 Million Jackpot was sold. Now, for the more amazing part - this isn't the first time they've sold a winning Lotto ticket!
Nope, back in 1995, they sold a $7 Million winner in the old Lotto jackpot. For those of you wondering, the odds of winning are 175,000,000 to 1. Sure, they sell a lot of tickets, but the odds of selling 2 winners has to be in the trillions.... Of course, past performance is no guarantee of future returns, but at least they have a track record. We'll check back in 2023 .....
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With Scenery Like This, You Don't Need Help From the President ......... Or Do You ?
With most of the plundering done in Washington for the week. The Obama's went back to their home in Chicago, to enjoy the cold, wind and crappy Chicago Bears football.... Who are we kidding? They took Option B, as Vincent LaGuardia Gambini would say, and took off to the warmth and love of Hawaii - Mahalo, Obama !! Who could blame them? Chicago sucks, and the weather is worse. I wouldn't expect The Obama's to ever step foot in Illinois again - juts like the Clintons did to Arkansas. Now George Bush? You couldn't get him away from the ranch in Crawford.....
Anyway, the real story is how Hawaii was really hoping for a push from Barack Obama's election to juice up their sagging economy. Until they find a useful purpose for lava, all Hawaii has for it's economy is Pineapples, Macadamia Nuts and Tourism - and you thought South Carolina's economy was a one trick pony... Teh general rule of thumb is that when money gets tight, you cut out the 6,000 mile trip to Paradise, and stay home. Obviously, that has taken quite a hit to the Aloha State's bottom line....
Local tourism experts hoped that the cachet of being the birthplace to Obama would jack up the tourism bucks, but the truth is it hasn't.... Why? Because Barack Obama didn't live in a log cabin, chop down a cherry tree, or attend a prestigious boarding school. Nope, he lived in an apartment complex and went to an ordinary elementary school - just like you and me. Makes the 6000 mile trek to visit your idol's childhood home a bit less alluring, doesn't it?
Still, they are hoping for better things, and eventually they will come. After all, it IS Hawaii ... The folks in Chicago are hoping for the same thing, but don't expect much. Obama isn't all jazzed to go back, and even Oprah's skipping town. At least they still have Wrigley Field - HERE BATTER, HERE BATTER, SUH-WING BATTER !!!!!!!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQrqZG8VQGY&feature=related
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This Week, It's Christmas and Health Care .....
There were a few to pick from this week, although I had to go to another site again this week (TIME, you're getting lame..). Many of them picked on the GOP for 'obstructing progress', but sometimes no is the better move.
We thought this cartoon best resembled what we think will happen. Here is our advice to the Democrats. If you think you can beat the Insurance and Drug companies at their own game, think again. You can't win. They have attorneys, accountants and specialists on staff, whose only job is to find and manipulate loopholes. You have college sophomores on staff whose only experience is that they once went to the Campus Health Office for some Advil.... You are shooting bear with a popgun. With every move you make, you only enable Big Insurance and Big Drugs to kick your ass - and the taxpayers asses - even more..........
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A Billy Idol Christmas Song ??As the last few hours wind down before Christmas is finally here, we wanted to send all of you our best wishes for a Happy Holiday. It was bad enough that we missed Festivus this year !! Anyway, a special selection from the SC6 Christams Jukebox ....... Billy Idol's 'Yelling at the Christmas Tree' ... Enjoy, and Merry Christmas !!!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLdJ5xWZSbo&feature=related
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Surprised That Reid Sweetened the Deal for Votes? Silly Rabbit ...
For those of you seething with rage over the fact that Harry Reid actually made sweetheart deals for those Senators who held out voting for his Health Care Bill, we have this message for you, and please don't take this the wrong way..... You're an idiot.
Sorry to be so hard on you, but this is one of thsoe weeks where even dreamers like Barack Obama realize that no matter how idealogical you may be, or how good your intentions are, there will always be a Senator or Congressman in DC with his/her hand out, telling you "FU .... Pay Me." Folks, this is how it is done, and how it's ALWAYS been done. It's just like in the Green Mile ...... 'He used their love to kill them. It's like this, everyday, all over the world.' John Coffey wasn't too bright, but he had brilliant political acumen.....
Yes, for every good idea that someone has, there will someone who will twist it, and distort the whole idea until it no longer resembles what it once was. It can be described in one term - What's In it For Me? At every level, it happens. It's the favorite term of two Florence City Councilmen who we'll not mention - let's just call them Ed and Billy D. for arguments sake.... Then, we have a State Legislature and Senate that overspent by double digits for a decade - then have the nerve to call themselves 'Conservative'..... Finally, it continues to Washington, where everyone has a line of backers that need to get paid off, not to mention the candidate themselves....
Yes, all the evils of the world have been brought upon us by the simple term, Getting Our Share.... The 'need' to bring home the bacon - or The Other White Meat - has left us with governments that put us in an endless spiral of deficits - mostly brought on by frivolous spending. So a Senator from Nebraska got $100 million in breaks for his state, and another in Florida got $25 billion for his.... This is how it is - and how it has been.... Term Limits, anyone?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWNyp3AMBN4
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Come Visit the 1859 Railway Museum of Jamestown, California - Smack In the Middle of Jim Clyburn's District .... Wait a Second.Just last week, I thought to myself that I hadn't picked on Jim Clyburn in a while. I thought about fabricating a story (maybe a Dora the Explorer spoof, where Jim is Swiper the Fox?), but I said to myself, 'Just wait - he'll do SOMETHING stupid'. I didn't have to wait long........
If you need any more proof that Congressmen and their staffers are idiots, check out the $100,000 mistake that was discovered this week. It seems that money that was supposed to go to the library in Jamestown, South Carolina, didn't quite make it. You see, due to 'technical errors', the money was accidentally allocated to Jamestown, California - just east of - YOU GUESSED IT! - San Francisco.... When the better part of your job includes being Nancy Pelosi's lackey, you might accidentally think that your home district is California, and not South Carolina.....
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The Malocchio - And Ahmad Bradshaw - Lead Dusty Lombardi To The Greatest Comeback In Fantasy Football History ???
Years from now, people will remember where they were, and what they were doing on this weekend. While little things like the War on Terror and Health Care Reform occupy our minds for a moment, big things took place this weekend....
Like what? Well, my fantasy football team overcame an unbelieveable deficit to beat Vader's Raiders 177.08-176.62 !! Yes, I won by the difference of 4 yards or one completion. All of this after I trailed by 75 points at about 500PM Sunday. I'm not sure if they keep records on this, but I'm sure it's the largest comeback I ever saw.....
So, how did I do it? Well, the obvious was a maonster game by Aaron Rodgers, capped by a 2 TD effort from Ahmad Bradshaw. The main contributor in my mind was the well-rested Malocchio that hadn't been used since Bobby regularly wore it out during the Steelers Super Bowl run last year. There is no substitute for the Evil Eye, and it was particularly satisfying to beat Vader's Raiders, since that is the nickname of my boss who canned me last week.... This week, it's another showdown against my arch friendemy, Dave , and his team Da Boilermakers. I'm 2-0 against them this year, but Dave always brings it, and it ain't easy beating a team 3 times - unless you're Jim Clyburn running against Gary McLeod.... Sorry, couldn't help it.
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How to Not Get an Endorsement, But Look Like You Did ....
It's not too often that we get out of the Pee Dee Swamp to talk about SC Congressional races, but this was too good to pass up. First, a disclaimer: We are in no way supporting or unsupporting any Republican candidate for any Congressional district in South Carolina. We have no dogs in any fight there or anywhere in SC.
Now, onto business.... The 4th Congressional race is turning almost into a comedy. An unpopular incumbent (Bob Inglis - Nice Guy, Wrong District), and along with him, a cast of opponents so many in number, you need a scorecard to keep track - and all of them trying to 'Out-Right' the other one. Only in the 4th ..... Anyway, this week, Inglis gave an interview, and apparently seeing the writing on the wall, told the media who he would prefer to lose to - if he had to lose. IF ???? Inglis' choice was Jim Lee, who I don't know, so I can't comment. I totally let this news pass, mainly because it had nothing to do with me, until I got an email last night, from one of the other candidates....
Again, like Jim Lee, I don't know Christina Jeffrey, aside from the fact that she's running in the 4th as well, and she's one of my Facebook friends. There is no doubt that Jeffrey is using SC Hotline for her campaign, and that's fine, but it pretty obvious: SCH has put out three articles either putting out her campaign's releases, or to criticize an opponent - which hasn't been confirmed. Also, Jeffrey has an ad on SCHotline's page, which does not come free... All of that is good and well, you just have to take that all into consideration when you hear from that source...
So, lat night I get one of Jeffrey's Press Releases through SCHotline, calling for Inglis to drop out of the race. But, the funny part is how she tried to spin Inglis' endorsement for Lee as a endorsement for her. Here are the exact quotes from Jeffrey's staff: 'Responding to a letter sent to supporters in which he endorsed an opponent for his seat, and said, "If I had to lose this race, I'd rather lose to....... a committed Believer who's in this race for all the right reasons." Jeffrey stated, "But I have to be heartened to hear my opponent himself acknowledge that the people of our district would be extremely well-served by a committed believer, that is, someone like me." WOW !!!!!
This is a very inventive piece of spinning if I ever saw one.... You see, the .........'s are where the words "Jim Lee" were. She simply left them out, and inserted herself where Lee used to be. Secondly, if you can get an endorsement outright, go ahead and say 'Well, they didn't endorse me, but they did endorse someone LIKE me'..... This sets a precedent for every 3rd or 4th place candidate that just can't make it out of the pack from now on..... Hey, even if candidate just kinda LOOKS like you, that could be justifiable grounds for co-oping an endorsement.....
Of course, the contrarian in me is wondering why Jeffrey even wants to tie herself in with Inglis by this endorsement-in-theory. If you don't like him so much, why not use it to attack Lee as a RINO, like you guys Upstate love to do so much, and have one less opponent to worry about, right? Hey, thats just my two cents. But, I will give you guys credit for attempting a wrinkle I never would have thought of - or tried...
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These Signs Aren't Up All Over Yet, But More Will Be Soon ...Like we always say, we are here to temper your unjustified enthusiasm, and to pick you up when you're ready to jump off the Ravenel Bridge .... As the Yin to your Economic Yang (?), we just got the news about the Palmetto State's unemployment rate once again rising in November to an all-time high of 12.3% ... It sounds really, really bad, but there are plenty of nuggets from here and elsewhere to give you rays of hope that the worst is over. I know I've said this before, but this is a long, dragging recession - even longer than we thought. Here's the hope:
1. The Good Side of 12.3%
No, I haven't lost my mind. Even when the rate goes up, there can be signs that better times are ahead. The main number? The number of employed people actually went up. The reason for the rate increase was that the number of job seekers went up by slightly more. That means that people who had given up on looking for work are getting back into the mix - and some are being hired...
2. It's Frigging November
Ahhh, the big November hiring blitz... Doesn't sound familiar, does it? It shouldn't. Companies, even many in retail, don't hire people until December, but the big hiring in manufacturing and other big businesses starts in January. Inventories are way down, and they have to restock at some point. They re-evaluate everything on January 1, then decide if they can hire - and many will hire a few.
3. Leading Economic Indicators
I'm surprised the spin doctors in the Obama Administration haven't used this stat more, but the leading economic indicators for consumers have actually risen for EIGHT STRAIGHT MONTHS. Granted, when you're in the basement, you can only go up, but maybe they've skipped it because it might show that the Stimulus, which started well after that, has had little effect on the economy - and why another one is wreckless. Check Mate...
Our Blog Hits The Big 0-Four !!!!!
Like we said earlier today, this is an anniversary week, and today is the least important of all the events we marked. Yes, it was four years ago today that SC6 began. She certainly has grown up - she's all potty trained, eating solid food, and now she'll be attending preschool soon ...... let's hope she'll finally learn something. By next year we're hoping she'll learn how to read.
Thanks for sticking around with us through thick and thin, employed and unemployed, running for office and not, and all the other in betweens of the close to 2500 blog posts we've written - who knew?
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NY Gov. Paterson Cuts School Payments by $500 Million, Everyone Sues
Can Dusty Lombardi Ride Aaron Rodgers to Another Title ?Everytime I blog about my fantasy football team, I lose that week. Well, that may happen anyway. But even if it does, we've had another good season. Dusty Lombardi (which was called DustingOffMyLombardi after coming out of retirement following a championship) finished in second place during the regular season, despite a last game throttling to finish at 9-5. Not bad, considering that we had NO running backs (thank you, Brian Westbrook and Marshawn Lynch), and Randy Moss and Anquan Boldin haven't been models of consistency this year....
Thanks to great numbers by Aaron Rodgers all year, and a few key later season pickups, we finished strong, and we'll be taking on Number 7 Vaders Raiders, who are 20 point favorites on us - don't ask, it's all matchups... What has me worried is that Vader has Peyton Manning, which negates my TE, Dallas Clark, because all the passes will come from Manning. Maybe he'll break a leg , or come out early. If not, we are fully armed for battle, with a Mallochio Hex that hasn't been used since last season. Beware the Evil Eye, Vader ...........
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Give 'Em an Inch, And They Take a Casino and 3600 Acres .....
If you ever wanted to know just why it seems so hard for Indian tribes to get federally recognized in the US, here is a good example why.... This week, the Office of Indian Affairs finally gave the Shinnecock Nation of Long Island it's official stamp of approval, after a 31 year battle. The Shinnecocks are pretty much about as legitimate as they come on the East Coast. They have a 600 acre reservation that's been in their control for hundreds of years, they're organized, and they met all the criteria - which is pretty stringent - that was required. Congrats to them.......
Now, for the hard part. You'll never guess what the first thing they want to do is. C'mon, ................ you know............. it's.................. a Casino ! Yep, the Shinnecocks want to bring the first legal casino to New York. While it would be nice for Long Islanders to not have to drive to Connecticut or Atlantic City to gamble, there is a lot more to this - and a lot more that the Shinnecocks want. You see, the Shinnecock Nation isn't just in a pine barren in Suffolk County - it's smack in the entrance way to The Hamptons. So, there are a lot of rich and powerful people who don't want a casino near their Summer getaways. Talks are already underway to move the casino to Belmont Park or Aqueduct Raceways - about 100 west of the reservation in New York City. It should be interesting....
The real kicker in getting recognized isn't the casino - that's small potatoes. What the the Shinnecocks are shooting for is - our favorite word - Reparations. You see, the reservation used to be 3600 additional acres from a treaty made with England back in 1703, and they want it back. The last time I checked, England didn't own Long Island, but that isn't stopping the tribe. You see, back in 1859, they settled with the US Government to take back the land, so rail lines could be built to access the East End. The tribe says the document is forged, but no one hwo ws there is around now, so who knows... The area is a 1/4 mile sliver between Shinnecock Bay and Peconic Bay, and there's no way around it - and the land is prime Real Estate. I don't know for sure, but $1 million an acre isn't out of the question. Times that by 3600, and you have $3.6 BILLION up for grabs.....
Adding to the problem is the fact that the land is developed, with private property owners, the Southhampton campus of Long Island University, and Shinnecock Hills Golf Course, where the US Open is regularly played.... Good Luck on settling that one, fellas. It's amazing to me that we entertain the thought of suing for something that was done, not to you or your parents, which I can understand, but for something that was done to people you can barely trace ancestry to 150 years earlier.... This is America -we can sue for anything....
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Hey, There's No Disclaimer, So ..........
Most people view the message inside of a fortune cookie to be pure entertainment, but a blogger in South Carolina is challenging the legal interpretation of the little piece of paper in court. Mike Reino, who's SC6 political blog is read by tens of readers every day, is suing the Wan Lo Chinese Restaurant in Bay Shore, New York for not following through on a 'promise' he found inside of a fortune cookie he got when he was nine years old.......
Reino, 41, is suing Wan Lo for breach of contract, because a message inside the cookie told him 'You will do great things in the future' - and he says that apparently was false. "It's 32 years later, and I haven't done Jack S**t, so obviously that cookie was a lie. Wan Lo is perpetrating a lie by telling their customers tha their futures are bright, when the opposite is probably true." When asked if a run for Congress and County Council might be considered a great accomplishment, Reino replied, "I didn't WIN, did I? Hell, anybody can run for office.." Lastly, when countered about the success of his blog, he tersely quipped, "Have you ever read SC6? It's dog poop! No one admits they read it - look at all the anonymous comments. C'mon - Cartoon of the Week and Fuzzy Thoughts ??!! What the hell am I talking about there??"
Can Three Furry Animals Get the Republican Party Back on Track ?? Sure .... What's Gonna Work ? TEAMWORK !!!!I've had this post in my noodle since I OD'd on Nick Jr. two months ago. In case you'e never seen the Wonder Pets, may we suggest watching this short clip of Linny, Tuck and Ming-Ming before reading this post - at least so you can get an idea of the music. All singing wil be italicized to help, ad any resemblance to Stephanie Rawlinson, Dana Shriver and myself is totally intentional......Here's the clip:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_a7lxnSeqk&NR=1
and, here we go.....
Linny: The phone! The phone is ringing!
Ming-Ming: The phone! We'll be right there!
Tuck: The phone ! the phone is ringing....
Linny: There's a party in trouble.
Ming-Ming: There's a party in trouble...
Tuck: There's a party in trouble somewhere (Grunts)...
Tuck: Who is it, Linny?
Linny: It sounds like a baby elephant.... Wait, it's the Republican Party.
Ming-Ming: What's a Wepubwican?
Linny: It's a political party, Ming-Ming.
Ming-Ming: Oh, I wuv parties! Are dey having cake??
Linny: Not that kind of party, Ming-Ming.. They're asking us for $4700 for the NRCC again!!!Tuck: Didn't they already call us three times this week, asking for money?
Linny: That's right , Tuck.
Ming-Ming: But I'm a poor, wittle duckwing - I don't even have a job!
Tuck: Didn't the Republican Party used to run the White House and Congress a few years ago?Linny: That's right, Tuck - but they've gotten out of touch with what they used to be....
Ming-Ming: What's Congwess, Winny?
Linny: Let's focus on learnign to talk first, Ming-Ming. We'll get to politics later. We've got work to do......To the Flyboat, Wonder Pets, we're going to Washington DC !!!!!
Tuck: There's a party - that's lost it's way....
Ming-Ming: This is Sewious !!!
Linny: We've got to help them...
ALL: Let's save the Party - Let's save the Party!!
Wonder Pets, Wonder Pets - we're on our way! To help the GOP and save the day........ We're not too big, and we're not too tough, but when we work together, we've got the right stuff !!!! YAY !!!!!
