'This Month's Issue of 'Letters to Penthouse Is FASCINATING !!!!'
Thought I'd pass this onto you guys. I got it from a little middle-aged lady in Clarendon County. It's a funny generalization of the major newspapers, and why type of person reads them - or doesn't read them. Having lived where a few of them are printed, they're pretty spot-on.
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country -- if they could find the time -- and if they didn'thave to leave Southern California to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running anothercountry but need the baseball scores.
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country . . . or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy, provided of course, that they are not Republicans.
11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.
12. The Atlanta Journal is read by people who have recently caught a fish and need something in which to wrap it.
.
7 comments:
I subscribe to the first one.
What happens if I read comic books and porn?
Moye, we already know that you run the country...
Earl, that tells everyone that life on the highway can get very slow and lonely.
only earl would come up with that
I don't think he's kidding, Moye.
Mike, come on now, you do know the roast ended back in May, right?
Sorry earl. I guess there's a couple hot coals still left on the BBQ... ;)
Post a Comment