Dear President Obama,
Happy 47th birthday ! Since it's your first birthday in the White House, I thought I'd send you some congrats. That, and it seems like everyday, I have a bunch of people I know that are having birthdays. Your my fifth today - I won't embarrass my other friends that share you birthday. I have the same birthday as OJ, so I understand totally......
Secondly, I wanted to write to try and pick you up. By now, I'm sure you're starting to get a little down. The media eventually turns on everyone at some point. Maybe you were hoping it would take at least six or seven years , not months. What do you expect when all of these Big Government programs - none of which have been shown to pay for themselves - contradict what you ran on. And those Birthers !!! Geez, when a slew of people can't even be convinced that you were born here, life is going to be hard. You have any of those Bud Lights left over?
I don't have a whole lot of advice for you - mainly because I don't think you'd bother listening anyway. You and the rest of the Democrats have ignored my good advice that the US Economy is so huge, that it only needs minor tweaking - and a little time - to turn itself around. Why bother? You guys have the ball, and I'm sure in normal DC fashion, you guys will drop it. Everyone there always does....
Nope, i just wanted to send a note to tell you to enjoy your first birthday as President. JFK was one of your heroes, so I thought you'd enjoy this present....
.
2 comments:
Mike, on behalf of the President, thank you. He did ask me to see if you would explain to your Republican friends that "bipartisan" does not mean we give you everything you possibly want. That this is largely a mess they helped make and that losing has consequences, yada, yada, yada.
I explained that they should know that. I mean afterall, their idea of bipartisanship was Joe Liberman signing off on something with his good buddy John McCain. But I reminded him these are the same people who are sponsoring a bill justifying the crazies who believe in an atty-dentist-real estate agent who looks like Cher and Zsa Zsa Gabor had a baby together and pointed out it was probably a lost cause.
Next he wanted me to tell you to keep you head up. I told him about your vast amount of useless '80s movie trivia and he was intriqued. Since he's busy allegedly turning us into the CCCP, he wanted me to tell you that if you agree to sell out, take his hand and not plummet into the abyss ala Luke Skywalker, he'd give you a 2-page column in the lone newspaper he allows to survive. "Pravada" will be a propoganda organ of the State bankrolled by high-end Italian fashion. The man knows his history...and fashion.
With kind regards, I am,
Pluv
How do you sing that in Kenyan?
Post a Comment