Sunday, June 06, 2010

Al Gore's New Pickup Lines ..

The World Is Your Oyster Again, Al... Go Get 'Em, Tiger !

The Boy Scout motto is Be Prepared - although we're pretty sure it wasn't intended for this purpose. So, with the stunning news that former Veep Al Gore and his wife Tipper were breaking up after 40 years, the motto does become more relevant. No, we don't recommend that aging guys whose weight is rising faster than the National Debt go back out in the market - but then again, we don't have an Oscar or Nobel Prize either....

As sad as the news is of a long-term couple breaking up, we would be remiss if we didn't give the almost-Prez some sound advice: have your pickup lines ready.... Even for a guy as powerful as Gore, if he walks up to a hottie and spouts, 'Hi, I'm Al Gore - I'm your density' ..... it's all over. Apparently, we weren't he only ones thinking about this. The Twitter pages have been burnign up with suggestions for Big Al, as he now likes to be called... So, here are some of the suggestions coming down the pike:

'Baby, you should win the Nobel Piece of Ass Prize'

'If you want to see how big my hanging chad is, let's go back to my place and do a recount.'

"Do you know how much that dress is contributing to Global Warming - cause you're making me hot!'

"I'd like to leave my carbon footprint.......... In your bedroom"

'You know what they call it when a bull stabs you with his horns? Yeah, its kinda like that'

'The beard isn't the only thing that I shaved off'

'Here's an Inconvenient Truth.... I'm HUGE'

'How do I love thee? Let me recount the ways....'

"Sweetie, I'm used to finishing second'

and lastly.....

"Say hi to my new Wingman................. Bill Clinton!'

.

No comments: